That’s what’s happening for people, what they’ll tell you is they won’t tell you that, what they’ll tell you is I don’t want to hurt the relationship
I don’t want to have some big conflict I don’t want to upset them you know I don’t want their response to derail the thing I’m trying to accomplish because it’s not always you know I’m being kind I don’t want to upset people right it’s also if they get upset we’re in a conflict then the thing I’m trying to accomplish is completely jeopardize sales people say that all the time there’s some sales people say I’m not having the conversation but I want the relationship and some of those people really care about the relationship some of those people don’t care about the relationship the only reason they care about the relationship is they care about the sale if they hurt the relationship they’re going to compromise the sale again you see
win don’t lose try to try to compete and achieve my objectiv y so that that’s a that’s a big part of what’s getting in people’s way their programming our programming and also our stories we often create all kinds of worst case disaster fantasies in our heads about all the bad stuff that’s going to happen if we actually are more truthful in the conversation, right.
And it’s not that those stories aren’t true at all, but they’re almost often not as true as you make them, right?
It ain’t going to be as bad as you think, and what’s als,o you’re not realizing it’s already pretty bad because you’re not having a conversation and if you don’t have it it’s going to get worse
